Favorite quotes from...

Clueless (1995)
(una de mis all time favorite movies, a pesar de ser tan frivola)

Cher: Miss Stoeger, I would just like to say that physical education in this school is a disgrace. I mean, standing in line for forty minutes is hardly aerobically effective. I doubt I've worked off the calories in a stick of Carefree gum.
Cher: Oh look, Josh is dancing with Tai, he never dances. Christian: I can see why.
Cher: Old people can be so sweet.
Christian: Hey man, protective vibe, I dig.
Cher: Isn't my house classic? The columns date all the way back to 1972.
Cher: He does dress better than I do, what would I bring to the relationship?
Cher: Would you look at that body language? Legs crossed towards each other. That is an unequivocal sex invite.
Mel: Do you know what time it is? Cher: A watch doesn't really go with this outfit, daddy.
Amber: Was I the only one listening?I thought it reeked. Cher: No I believe that's your designer imposter perfume.
Christian: Do you like Billie Holiday? Cher: I love him. (Yeah she was clueless)

Cher: Sometimes you have to show a little skin. This reminds boys of being naked, and then they think of sex.
Cher: Anything you can do to draw attention to your mouth is good.
Cher: You can't be the absolute and final word on drivers' licenses? Driving Instructor: Girlie, as far as you're concerned, I am the messiah of the DMV.
Cher: That's Ren and Stimpy. They're way existential.
Cher: Ms. Stoger. That machine is just a lawsuit waiting to happen. Miss Stoger: Thanks for the legal advice.
Amber: She could be a farmer in those clothes.
Cher: Okay, so you're probably going, "Is this like a Noxzema commercial or what?" But seriously, I actually have a way normal life for a teenage girl.

Cher: Christian said he'd call the next day, but in boy time that meant Thursday.
Cher: Dionne and her boyfriend Murray are in this dramatic relationship. I think they've seen that Ike and Tina Turner movie too many times.
Travis: I would like to say this. Tardiness is not something you can do on your own. Many, many people contributed to my tardiness. I would like to thank my parents for never giving me a ride to school, the LA city bus driver who took a chance on an unknown kid and last but not least, the wonderful crew from McDonalds who spend hours making those egg McMuffins without which I'd never be tardy.
Travis: I joined this program and there's steps. There's... uh... Cher: Twelve? Travis: Yeah, how'd you know? Cher: Wild guess.
Tai: Why should I listen to you, anyway? You're a virgin who can't drive. Cher: That was way harsh, Tai.
Cher: Would you call me selfish? Dionne: No, not to your face.

Tai: Cher, I don't want to do this anymore. And my buns: they don't feel nothin' like steel.
Mel: What the hell is that? Cher: A dress. Mel: Says who? Cher: Calvin Klein.
Dionne: Phat! Did you write that? Cher: Duh. It's like a famous quote. Dionne: From where? Cher: Cliff's Notes.
Cher: So like, right now for example. The Haitians need to come to America. But some people are all, "What about the strain on our resources?" Well it's like when I had this garden party for my father's birthday, right? I put R.S.V.P. 'cause it was a sit-down dinner. But some people came that like did not R.S.V.P. I was like totally buggin'. I had to haul ass to the kitchen, redistribute the food, and squish in extra place settings. But by the end of the day it was, like, the more the merrier. And so if the government could just get to the kitchen, rearrange some things, we could certainly party with the Haitians. And in conclusion may I please remind you it does not say R.S.V.P. on the Statue of Liberty. Thank you very much.
Cher Horowitz: I was just totally clueless.
Cher: Do you prefer "fashion victim" or "ensembly challenged"?
Cher: Dionne and I were both named after famous singers of the past, who now do infomercials.
Cher: Searching for a boy in high school is as useless as searching for meaning in a Pauly Shore movie.
Josh: You want to practice parking? Cher: What's the point? Everywhere you go has valet.
Cher: [Referring to Josh] Okay, okay, so he is kind of a Baldwin.
Tai: I could really use some sort of herbal refreshment. Dionne: Oh, well we do lunch in ten minutes. We don't have any tea, but we have Coke and stuff. Tai: No shit. You guys got Coke here? Dionne: Well, yeah. Cher: Yeah, this is America.
Tai: Cher, you're a virgin? Cher: You say that like it's a bad thing. Dionne: Besides, the PC term is "Hymenally challenged".
Mel: You mean to tell me that you argued your way from a C+ to an A-? Cher: Totally based on my powers of persuasion, you proud? Mel: Honey, I couldn't be happier than if they were based on real grades.
Amber: Ms. Stoeger, my plastic surgeon doesn't want me doing any activity where balls fly at my nose. Dionne: Well, there goes your social life.
Murray: Your man Christian is a cake boy! Cher, Dionne: A what? Murray: He's a disco-dancing, Oscar Wilde reading, Streissand ticket holding friend of Dorothy, know what I'm saying? Cher: Uh-uh, no way, not even! Murray: Yes even, he's gay! Dionne: He does like to shop, Cher. And the boy can dress.
Cher: Daddy, this is my friend, Tai. Mel: [to Tai] Get the hell outta my chair!

Josh: Hey, James Bond, in America we drive on the right side of the road. Cher: I am. You try driving in platforms.
[about keeping her virginity] Cher: You see how picky I am about my shoes and they only go on my feet.
Cher: If it's a concussion, you have to keep her conscious, okay? Ask her questions. Elton: What's seven times seven? Cher: Stuff she knows.
Cher: Looks like we're gonna have to make a cameo at the Val party.
Cher: It's like that book I read in the 9th grade that said "'tis a far far better thing doing stuff for other people."
Cher Horowitz: So okay, I don't want to be a traitor to my generation and all but I don't get how guys dress today. I mean, come on, it looks like they just fell out of bed and put on some baggy pants and take their greasy hair - ew - and cover it up with a backwards cap and like, we're expected to swoon? I don't think so.
Cher: I am totally butt crazy in love with Josh.
Cher: "Second notice on an outstanding ticket." I don't remember getting a first notice. Mel: The *ticket* is the first notice.
Cher: [about Josh] A licensed driver with nothing to do? Where would I find such a loser?
Cher: Christian had a thing for Tony Curtis so he brought over "Some Like it Hot" and "Sporadicus". (Yeah Clueless)
Cher: So, this flannel thing. Is that a nod to the crispy Seattle weather, or are you just trying to stay warm in front of the refrigerator?
Cher: Lucy, the fire department called again. They said we need to clear out that bush. You said you'd get Jose to do it. Lucy: He your gardener, I don't know why you no tell him. Cher: Lucy, you know I don't speak Mexican. Lucy: I NOT A MEXICAN. Lucy: [storms off] Cher: Great, what was that all about? Josh: Lucy's from El Salvador. Cher: So? Josh: So, it's an entirely different country. Cher: What does that matter? Josh: You get mad if anyone thinks you live below Sunset.
Murray: Woman, why don't you be answerin' any of my pages? Dionne: I hate when you call me woman. Murray: Where you been all weekend? What's up? You been jeepin' behind my back? Dionne: Jeepin'? Jeepin'? No. But, speaking of vehicular sex, perhaps you can explain how this cheap K-Mart hair extension got into the backseat of your car. Murray: I don't know where that came from. That looks like one of your little stringy somethin' or an others you got over here. Dionne: I do not wear polyester hair, okay? Unlike some people I know like Shawana. Cher: Dee, I'm outty. Dionne: Bye. Murray: Why do you got to go there? Why do you gotta go there? Is it that time of the month again?
Cher: [after she and Josh kiss] Well you can guess what happened next... [we see a couple about to wed] Cher: AS IF. I am only 16, and this is California, not Kentucky.
Cher: As if.
Cher: Suddenly a dark cloud settled over first period... I got a C in debate?
Josh: Do you have any idea what you're talking about? Cher: No. Why, does it sound like I do?
Amber: [makes W with her hands] Whatever.
Cher: I felt impotent and out of control. Which I really, really hate. I had to find sanctuary in a place where I could gather my thoughts and regain my strength... [we see a wide shot of the mall]
Dionne: Dude, what's wrong you suffering from buyers remorse or something? Cher: God no, nothing like that.
Cher: Wasn't my mom a total Betty? She died when I was young. A freak accident during a routine liposuction.
[driving up to a huge house] Cher: This is where Dionne lives. She's my friend because we both know what it's like for people to be jealous of us.
Cher: You are such a brown-noser. Josh: Oh, and you are such a superficial space cadet. What makes you think you can get teachers to change your grades? Cher: The fact that I've done it every other semester.
Tai: Do you think she's pretty? Cher: No, she's a full-on Monet. Tai: What's a monet? Cher: It's like a painting, see? From far away, it's OK, but up close, it's a big old mess. Let's ask a guy. Christian, what do you think of Amber? Christian: Hagsville. Cher: See?
Tai: Wow, you guys talk like grown-ups!
Tai: Shit, you guys, I have never had straight friends before!
Mel: Where are you? Cher: I'm just having a snack at my girlfriend's. Mel: Where, in Kuwait? Cher: Is that in the valley?
Mel: I'd like to see you have a little direction. Cher: I have direction! Josh: Yeah, towards the mall.
Josh: I was thinking about looking into environmental law. Mel: Why? You want to have a frustrating and miserable life? Cher: Oh, Josh will have that no matter what he does.
Cher: [in the middle of wondering why she's feels so horrible because of Tai and Josh; looks in a store window] [thinks] Cher: Ooh! I wonder if they have that in my size.
Josh: Look, I'm just curious. How many hours a day do you spend grooming yourself? Cher: Some people are not lucky enough to be as naturally adorable as you are. Josh: Stop it, you're making me blush.
Christian: Nice stems.
Tai: You think I'm a mentally retarded airhead? Cher: I never said that, I just think you two wouldn't mesh.

Cher's main thrill in life is a makeover, it gives her a sense of control in a world full of chaos.-Dion

"Oh, no. You don't understand this is an Alaia."Robber-"An a-what-a?""It's like a totally important designer."Robber-"And I will totally shoot you in the head. Get down!"-Cher

What'd you care what he thinks, Murray? I'm the one who has to look at you. That was a big mistake. What am I going to do with you know? And right before the year book pictures? What am I gonna tell my grandchildren?-Dionne

I am rescuing her from teenage hell. Do you know the wounds of adolescence can take years to heal?"Paul-"Yeah, and you've never had a mother and your acting out on that poor girl as if she was you Barbie doll.-Cher

Why am I even listening to you to begin with? You're a virgin that can't drive!-Tai

Cher's saving herself for luke perry-dionne

Old people can be so sweet.-Cher

Cher: Hey Granola Breath, you got somethin' on your chin.Josh: I'm growing a goatee.Cher: Oh, that's nice. You don't want to be the last one at the coffee house without chin pubes.-Cher and Josh

Travis: I'm sorry about your shoes.Cher: What shoes?Travis: The red ones with the strappy thing...Cher: Oh, those? They're so last season! What even made you think of them?Travis: It's one of my steps. See, I joined this club...and they have al-Cher and Travis

Ever notice how wine makes people feel, like, sexy?-Christian

DIONNE: Hello, that was a stop sign. CHER: I totally paused!-Clueless

Esta parte me encanta, me la se de memoria
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JOSH
Yeah, well, it's a good learning experience, at least for me, I want to be a lawyer. But you, I mean, you don't need to be doing this. Go out and have fun, go shopping.
CHER
You think that's all I do, I'm just a ditz with a credit card?
JOSH
No, no, ah, that's not what I meant.
(Josh just stutters a bit, looking for the right words)
You're young and beautiful...and...
CHER
And?
JOSH
And, well, uh, what?
CHER
You think I'm beautiful?
(YES, YES!!!! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, YES!!!!)
JOSH
You know your gorgeous, alright? And popular, and, um, and... but this is not why I, you know, I come here. This is a good learning experience for me.
CHER
You already said that.
JOSH
Mel, I wanna help out Mel. He's the only one who cares about me.
CHER
That's not true.
JOSH
He's not? Are you saying you care about me?
CHER
Josh.
(Cher goes to hit his shoulder, but he catches her with a kiss. Good move!)
(Both like it. So they try again.)

It's Friday I'm in Love

I'm Outty :)